March 5, 2010

Woman Versus Mouse

{FYI, mice are not this cute in real life}

Sure he's small and has a squeaky falsetto. But this mouse is not cute. No, this mouse is a pox upon my daily living. It all started last summer when I came home from a weekend away to find mouse droppings all over my apartment bedroom, including my bed! I discovered a large hole behind my radiator, which seemed to be the source of the problem. So. I had a meltdown.

I can do bugs and snakes, but if there's mice...it's all over. I did eventually straighten myself out and proceeded to clean the place and stuff the hole with steel wool. I also set a box trap and some glue traps around my room, just in case. A few weeks later I noticed more droppings. Great. I then scoured my room for additional holes, stopping up the ones I could find and even going so far as to line the bottom of my door with steel wool.

Quieter times ensued until one October morning at 3:45 am, I awoke to a rustling by the radiator in my room. Bleary-eyed, I turned on the light to find the smallest mouse you ever saw stuck and struggling on a glue trap by the radiator. Making visual contact with the creature who had turned my room into a place I now regarded as squalid (perhaps dramatic but how I felt) incited vindictive feelings within me. However, seeing how small the mouse really was I began to feel a slight pang of compassion for it. The combination of these two emotions resulted in angry tears. I rose from my bed, talking to the wee mouse, "Ooo, I really hate you. I'm so sorry to do this but you are making my room a mess and I can't have you here."

It was almost four in the morning. And I was all on my own. Somehow, I managed to get the mouse and trap combo into a paper bag and I ran the package of demon goods down to the dumpster with great speed and many sleepy tears. Then, relief set in and I felt like I could put this chapter behind me.

However, where there is one...there are usually more.

A few weeks ago, I noticed some dark specks on the floor by a corner my bedroom. Looking closer, one of my worst fears came to the surface: mouse droppings. An experienced catcher of all things mice and having greater menace towards these creatures than ever, I walked right over to the hardware store and picked up some snap traps. This was war.

I put big globs of peanut butter on the traps and set them in the places where I found the droppings. The next morning I awoke to a rustling but found no trapped mouse. The peanut butter appeared to have been partially licked off and the trap had been tilted to accommodate the dining pleasures of this devious scum of the earth. About to get out of bed, I saw a small black shape fly across the floor to the radiator (further investigation revealed a previously undiscovered hole that I quickly stuffed with steel wool). Okay. You wanna play rough, mouse? Let's dance, pretty boy.

{My bed makes way for mouse-catching central in the corner}

I realized that the traps I bought weren't working, so I went in search of traps with a more powerful SNAP! I then taped the traps to the floor (with a way to easily remove them when they catch my prey) and placed the tiniest smidgen of peanut butter (any taste could be fatal).

Last night, tension and discomfort built about whether the traps would work. I barely slept (okay, maybe that was because I listened to This American Life all night and kept the light on...who knows). Anyways, still no mouse, but I am hoping this will work because I am tired of feeling so gross in my own room. I like to keep my room clean and comfortable - my place of personal solitude. I am a creature acutely influenced by her surroundings and the presence of these vermin has proved to be a great test of my character. Trying to find the silver linings wherever I can!

Image found here (a DIY human mouse catching post that just sounds like crazy talk).

6 comments:

  1. You will prevail. I am sure of it. And, hopefully once spring hits you won't have any more problems because mr. mouse will resume living out-of-doors.

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  2. I've heard things about Brookline and mice.

    And I totally feel your pain. I had them crawling in and out of the trash bag in my garbage can for a week to get to an empty soup can I accidentally threw away. I was too chicken to go bag the thing up because I was afraid they'd crawl up my arms to get out.

    So I finally got brave, took the trash to the dumpster, and went to bed. I heard this scrambling noise in the middle of the night, go in the kitchen, and there's a baby mouse who dove to his death thinking there would be a bag in the trash can to save him.

    So I haul the trash can out to the sidewalk (crying because the mouse is jumping) and throw him into the street.

    Then I wake up again, TO ANOTHER MOUSE in the trash can. Same thing ensues.

    And things have not gotten better. I hate mice. And they've ruined "home" for me.

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  3. Oh dude, you poor thing. I hope your room is a mouse free zone ASAP!

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  4. oh no! I do not tolerate rodents well either! My brother just had a mouse problem in his kitchen. I kept calling it Ratatouille, and I think it actually made him feel bad when he finally got rid of it, because he kept picturing the cute little Disney character! Hope you're having a mouse-free weekend!! XOXO

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  5. Oh no!!!! I feel for you---I am DEATHLY afraid of mice. I hope you catch him and get a good nights sleep tonight! XO

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