October 29, 2009

It Could Be

We live in such an introspective time. It seems that never before have we had the luxury to spend so much time thinking [about ourselves, mostly]. Not just the amount of time we have but the number of people - a whole society - that have this opportunity to "soul-search" or "enter the path towards self-actualization." Some days, I feel like that is all I have: time. And yet, the world shows me how quickly it all goes and how precious each seemingly monotonous moment can be. I, like many of my gender, am an overthinker. So much so, that I think my perpetual exhaustion as of late is due to my overthinking. This week I have felt completely immobile on what direction to take my life (yes, Zach, perhaps this is my quarter-life crisis rearing its cruel, pugnacious head). Sometimes I feel as though my life is the movie Sideways with my current life and then the one I could have were I to make different choices (I know, I could drive myself mad thinking this way).

There are moments where I feel like I am standing on the sidelines or on a hill, watching people go by me. This must be normal, but it still feels strange and worrying. I hope it passes soon. I know it will, but for now, it feels like Great Aunt Agatha who came for a week-long visit and ended up staying six months.

Image found here.

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